She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
he thought i was a dude.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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