no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
