If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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