so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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