he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
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