pedialite and red bull = repair kit
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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