Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
