Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Randomize
