Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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