these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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