We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize