I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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