It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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