So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
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