"it" just moved
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize
