I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I won't apologize to a one balled man
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
