i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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