Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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