i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Randomize