just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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