I must be too annoying 4 u.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
