Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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