Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize