if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
