She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
