Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
They took my balls.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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