I want to stick my p in your. b.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Randomize
