It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
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