I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Randomize
