Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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