I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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