we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
