I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize
