WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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