i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize