Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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