I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
