Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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