So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
