Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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