We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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