would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize