She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
