Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
