my mouth tastes like poor choices
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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