whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
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