i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she smelled like a LAN party
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize