I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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