nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
