We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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