What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner